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I am married to my loving husband for more than 40 years now. I am a mother to 3 beautiful children, until years ago when I lost my youngest son. Since then my life is forever altered but yet unbroken....

Tuesday 4 November 2014

Wrestling with fear...

"Often we created a self-imposed prison that is made up of imaginary walls..."


Fear stopped my heart today.

Early in the morning I was already at the Heart Centre, Pantai Hospital. I have been wearing the BP monitoring watch for 24 hours since yesterday morning and it’s time to take it off. When the nurse offered me to have a look at the printout, I refused. I don’t usually look away from painful and complicated truths. Without looking at the result I already sensed my troubled situation. Dr Ng’s initial diagnosis of erratic pumping of the heart was so compelling, it shaped my imagination in crafting horror scenes.

When I finally met Dr Ng at 11:00, he narrated the full result of the medical check-up tests. Except for my constantly high BP the rest of the results were not that bad after all and some were even better than last year’s. After performing the heart ultra-sound, I was diagnosed with a healthy heart and he prescribed special medication to reduce my BP.

My next appointment will be in a month’s time, meanwhile I am going to breathe in air and forget about this fearful episode.

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