About Me

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I am married to my loving husband for more than 38 years now. I am a mother to 3 beautiful children, until 11 years ago when I lost my youngest son. Since then my life is forever altered but yet unbroken....

Monday, 30 August 2010

Learned from adversity…

"The world is like a mirror; frown at it, and it frowns at you. Smile, and it smiles, too..." - Herbert Samuel

Tonight, we celebrated the blessing of good health and wealth with our wonderful family.

By popular demand, we had our family dinner at Victoria Station for an early celebration for our 31st Anniversary and Iwan’s birthday which both fall on 1st September. We had not called for a reservation but were quite confident that there will be seats available. We reached the restaurant a little late and way after iftar hour. And we were not overly hungry for we already had our ‘berbuka puasa’ with some kueh mueh at home.

Each of us ordered our favourite dish and by the time we finished we were full to the brim and some of us were contemplating not to bersahur later on.

As for me, I have always berbuka puasa with simple light meals. So tonight, my ravenous indulgence in chillie spare ribs and banana split for dessert has resulted in me lying wide awake in the wee hour of the night while the whole world is past asleep.

I should have known better not to over eat. There are a few things that I should have learned from adversity.

(Table for 8 and a half)

Thursday, 26 August 2010

Looking at the stars...

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars..."

It has been a long time since I get in touch with old friends. I guess everyone was busy with their own private commitments. Until today when Doc Yus sent a simple e-mail asking how is everyone. I saw a barrage of e-mails from others. And of course, from their responses I know that they are still alive and kicking. Although there was little indication of allusion to vigor and vivacity from any of those friends of mine, but I am glad to hear from them.

This morning I was about to say my ‘Amen’ a bit more loudly when I received a short sms from a friend after a long silence. He was hospitalized and is now recuperating after undergoing a major operation. My prayers are for him and for those friends who are suffering from sickness or poor health. I never doubt that Allah in his mercy will surely hear me and say ‘yes’ to my prayers. Except for my occasional body aches here and there, I thank God that I am in the best of health.

I am looking at the sky now. if I could kiss the stars, trust me, that would be the first thing I would do...

(Two moons on 27 August?)

Monday, 23 August 2010

Final destination...

"I never think of the future. It comes soon enough..".- Albert Einstein

Today is the 13th day of Ramadhan.

And today is a sad day for us as we lost a friend, Dr Ayub in the morning and my sister-in-law lost her mother in the evening. Both suffered from severe heart strokes.

Innalillah... Al-fatihah '

Sunday, 22 August 2010

Love is giving...

"Love is not finding someone to live with; it's finding someone whom you can't live without..."
(Tenoh, Perak)
Love is Giving

Love is giving, not taking,
Mending, not breaking,
Trusting, believing,
Never deceiving,
Patiently bearing
And faithfully sharing
Each joy, every sorrow,
Today and tomorrow.

Monday, 16 August 2010

Happy Birthday Yang...

"Life is like a box of chocolate..."

Tonight we celebrated dear hubby's birthday with Iwan, Ella and baby Hana at Bubba Gump, the Curve. The weather is cool and the restaurant is not over crowded. The ambiance is nice and comfortable. We left the ordering of food to Iwan and Ella. We didn’t order seafood chowder as suggested by Sara, who is in JB and missed celebrating her father’s birthday this year. The bucket of sea-food platter, a plateful of drunken shrimp and A rack of BBQ ribs were more than enough to fill four hungry tummies.
(Birthday boy with his naughty grand-dotter)

Today's a very special day
Reserved just for you
With deepest fondest love
From me and the kids too

Happy Birthday, Yang…

Thursday, 12 August 2010

Ramadhan Al-Kareem...

"Your attitude is like aroma of your heart. If your attitude stinks, it means your heart is not right..."

The first night of terawih at Masjid Wilayah was a total havoc.

Compared to last year, there were twice as many jemaah and cars that swarmed the mosque that night. The limited parking space was packed to the brim. Unscrupulous drivers simply double and triple parked their vehicles and caused massive traffic jam. There were commotions when some of the jemaah who finished the terawih early were unable to get out.

We were stuck in the jam for almost an hour. I typically don’t get fired up over traffic jam but with my strained back I am disgusted by the whole undisciplined lot of them.

(Masjid Wilayah)

A blessed month is casting its shadow upon us
A night of this month is better than a thousand months
Bear with patience for the sake of Ar-Rahman
It's a continuous training to strengthen our Imaan...

Wednesday, 11 August 2010

Cast my line…

"Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in our own sunshine..." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have been emasculated.

My life is not all doom and gloom. But how I lived my whole life with pain is beyond me.

My back is hurting again. I need to remember this, when I’m stressed and get caught up in work and whatever else I am doing I forget about my ailing back. I need a rest. I think I’m going to propose a week that will require me to actually spend my time lazing by a river, watching small fishes nibbling at my bait.

Without the interference from anyone, I can do anything or nothing and have the best of time…

(2006 - Auckland, New Zealand)

The river flows quiet and swift,
twists and turns as the water drift
Poised ready to cast my line,
Begins a cascade of wondering mind…

Thursday, 5 August 2010

The suspense is killing me...

"Almost any man knows how to earn money, but not one in a million knows how to spend it..." - Thoreau

If it was a scam, it may not strip me of all my savings but it sure stripped me of my pride.

This year I have been receiving quite a few of those e-mails either asking for donations or assistance. Yes, I should have just ignored and deleted them, but just like everybody else, I wanted to contribute no matter how little, even though I was forewarned that con men preyed on unsuspecting individuals, like me.

This morning when I received an urgent distress sms from YB asking me to transfer some money into her account, I was obliged to assist as she’s in Lojing and unable to perform the transaction from there. I called her after I made the transfer but her line was dead. And I was beginning to get worried.

I am constantly avoiding being gnawed on. But fraud is a reality that you will have to live with and beware….

Tuesday, 3 August 2010

I feel like screaming…

"With out a little strife wouldn't life be quite dull?..."

Very often when we discussed about the necessity to protect important data, we reminded everyone in the department to back-up their files. And lately everyone has been uploading reports, working files and important articles in the department centralized repository databank. I, for one, am very careful with my working files and absolutely understand that corrupt data happens, hard drives will fail, and mistakes will erase data. And I, like the rest, have been diligently backing-up my files into my external drive.

This morning, when I was doing my regular disk clean up to clear some space, instead of deleting files from my pc I have deleted files from my external drive. Like most people, I only think about a second back-up a few seconds after the catastrophic action and it's too late to do any good. One thing I've found that is sure to bring tears. I have deleted even my many years of historical files.

So, I am going to save myself a little heartache and lost time now and start to back up my data again. Heaven knows how much misery it cost me this time.

It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.…

(Hana screaming her heart out)

Monday, 2 August 2010

Colorful Annual Dinner...

"No man is happy without a delusion of some kind..."

(Opening show by BNM staff...)

I didn't want to miss this year's Annual Dinner as this was my last in the organisation.

The annual dinner was not as great as others that we had attended so far, but not that bad. The chinese 7-course dishes were only so so. I heard complaints from those who chose western food too. Most probably the tastebuds are not as sensitive as they used to. I am not complaining. I was seated with the company of my staff and spouses from Kilang Wang and Currency Department. And they seem to enjoy the food as well as the show.

The MC was quite entertaining and managed to get the audience to participate in his charades. There were lucky draws and many good prizes to be won. Later we were entertained by Anuar Zain but we were too sleepy to wait till the end. 

(Warming up before dinner was served)
(The guest artist for the night)

Sunday, 1 August 2010

Life snapshots…

"Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die tomorrow..."

My ex-datin friend and I shared a room during our 2-hour spa session. While we had our back scrubbed and massaged we talked about life in general. And she told me that lately she has been reading my blog over and over and told me that my style of writing changed over the years.

I told her that my writing is a meditation of sorts. Writing is my private passion, something I do for my own heart and soul. It's one of the ways in which I remind myself of the good, the bad and the ugly happenings around me each and every day. My story is a series of snapshots of life. Writing helps me to remember. It's one of the ways I get through my mundane days.

And I like to ponder on friends’ lives too. But how can I orchestrate the lives of others with my own mystified and confused?

(Moone Beach, Australia)
We often talk about love and life in sync
Love becomes a grievous affliction
Love cuts very deep sometimes
But it also heals very quickly…