About Me

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I am married to my loving husband for more than 38 years now. I am a mother to 3 beautiful children, until 11 years ago when I lost my youngest son. Since then my life is forever altered but yet unbroken....

Thursday, 27 May 2010

The rat race…

"Money is not the prime asset in life. Time is..."

There is a saying: Anyone who lives within their means suffer from a lack of imagination...

I was in a meeting with the officials from our Spanish counterpart when the topic of me retiring before the end of year cropped up again. ‘Why do you want to retire now? You are still young – unless you already have lots of money…’ I told him that I am reaching my official retirement age, unless my organisation would offer to extend my employment on a contract basis, which I doubt they would. A little arrogance here but no offence intended, if they do offer me, I would politely decline. But needless to say, many will scramble to accept the offer, for the pay is much, much more that being offered elsewhere.

For most people wealth is measured in dollars and cents but for me wealth is measured in term of time. If I stop working today, how many years can I cover all my living expenses? If the answer is forever, then I am wealthy. Like most people, I have struggled with saving enough money at the end of every month to meet my retirement goals. I want to be wealthy and free from the bonds of employment and free from debts.

My advice, to my children especially, there are no hard and fast rules but if you really put your mind into it, you potentially can achieve your goals quite easily. One thing for sure, you have to clear your debts and change the lifestyles that forever keep you stuck in the daily rat race.

Wednesday, 26 May 2010

Left with memories…

"Death is one enemy none can escape. It’s a part of life, and memories a part of living..."

I was surprised to receive a message from a friend this morning. After reading the short text, I was for a while lost for words. Nothing came to mind. I could feel the sadness for the loss of a beloved father, yet nothing I can say or offer will be consoling enough to erase or lessen the grief.

My condolences to the family. Al-fatihah...

Memories are all that are left.
Each becomes a well-worn photograph.
Missing is the warmth, the touch, the heft
Of life, the smile, the reassuring laugh...'

Tuesday, 25 May 2010

Fasten your seatbelts…

"Happiness is a gift. And the trick is not to expect it, but to delight in it when it comes..."

Thank goodness the tutorials for my new car only took two hours on Sunday morning. If not we would have missed the wedding in KL and the appointment in Melaka.

It may take a while for me to get use to the gadgets and idiot lights but I guess it is good to know of the high standard of travelling safety the car has to offer. Hopefully I would not be easily distracted or startled with the accessories. With my style of driving, knowing where the accelerator and the brakes are, is good enough for me.

But when and if I need to prove my mad driving skills, I may, one of these days take up the offer to drive at Sepang F1 track.

Saturday, 15 May 2010

Stressful life...

"It's better to be extremely happy for a short while than to be just 'okay' for your whole life..."

Lately my life is busier and more stressful!

The whole morning was spent in bed, trying my best to nurse my ailing back. I had taken loads of medicines but the muscle pain still persists. My upper back is now painful as I sit at work longer. The stresses and pressures are greater when I rest and relax less, and I am under more strain lately. On top of that I have to bear with my gastric pain too.

The back pain has left me depressed but I am not going to allow it to spoil my weekend with the kids. Lunch time today, all in the family went to Segambut for a kenduri akikah. The afternoon was spent resting and napping. We had family dinner at ‘Just Thai’ in 1-Utama and later with Sara and Fitri, we watched the movie ‘Iron Man 2’.

Thursday, 13 May 2010

A little pampering...

"Life is hard, but its good to be alive..."

My backache is bothering me again…

Today is my first day in the office after being away. I was expecting my diary to be free. But somehow news of the court case postponement has reached many. And they scrambled to block my time. I am disappointed. Any conscientious person with half a brain and even a little heart instinctively knows that I need some space to clear my emails and in-trays.

And it was also to hubby’s disappointment when I was not overly excited when he showed me my 55th birthday present. But then when I looked at the model, it was love at first sight. I love it and I know that the cost will dent whatever savings that we have. We have chosen the model and color and made the booking, even our special number plate is already available for use.

It is many months too early before my birthday but there is no harm for me to indulge in a little bit of pampering…

Wednesday, 12 May 2010

A bad hair day…

"Life craziness has thrown a curve ball to my routine..."

I may always feel bad about myself in one way or the other. I often have a negative picture of myself and what I can achieve. The past 2 days I was drilled and grilled in court as if I was the accused instead of the witness. But I stood strong in the witness dock and pride myself in answering all questions calmly.

Today it was a different ball game altogether when it came to my turn to be crossed. The defense counselor cum psychoanalyst went all out to discredit me with questions way out of context, I was near to giving him a piece of my mind and get me charged for contempt of court. If not for the judge’s soothing reprimanding voice that held my retaliation at bay. My blood was nearly reaching boiling point at one point of time. I hate it when people look at me and want what they want me to be instead of what I actually am.

Sure, there are worse things in life, but let's face it. I am having a bad hair day today, literally.

Monday, 3 May 2010

Suppressed emotions...

"Memories are wonderful things, if you don't have to deal with the past..."

(Am I losing hope?)

There will never be a perfect moment to reflect on my confused life.

I realize that at times, I do indeed tend to reflect in a less than positive way. I am allowing negative thoughts to build up and simmer in my mind. Very often this creates suppressed emotions which build steam and are eventually likely to erupt.

If I wait until every aspect of my life is in complete order to make my life better, I will likely be waiting a very long time.

But, there are some moments that I treasure,
when there's nothing else on this earth that matters,
so I make a wish in my heart, and put a smile on my lips
I give love another chance, I give hope one more reason...

Sunday, 2 May 2010

Grandmas and Grandpas B'day Meet...

"It's funny how when you're a kid a day can last forever and now all these years seem like a blink..."

The grandmamas and grandpapas of SMKB met again to celebrate Adilah and Nasir's birthday at Secret Recipe. Today is the first time I met with another two of our long lost friends, Ramlan and Fakhri. Thanks to Col Abdul and Bee for arranging for the reunion.
(From L-R: Ramlan, Nasir, Hasni, Col. Abdul, Nasidah, YB Ubai, Noriah,
Adilah, Doc Helmi, Nong and Fakhri -not in the pic)